Back in highschool there used to be a rather popular AIM bot called bizzarokiehl that used to spout the funniest most nonsencial crap. The neat thing about it was that you could teach it phrases by talking to it, and you could make it talk to poeple on your buddy list.
Ever since that time I have always wanted such a bot around, and finally last year I found out that a java AIM bot existed which has the exact same functionality which I wanted, and some extra.
I have modified the code slightly to fit my aim bot needs and launched the bot. I also created a fake myspace profile to lure unsuspecting
Here are some select logs for your enjoyment:
This conversation is what 50% of the conversations poeple have with the bot are like:
26» 7:2:3pm bevo230: hey
26» 7:2:3pm Bot: I think i've worked it out! You are the computer program, And i looked like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, Hey, Free dummy.
26» 7:2:19pm bevo230: i saw ur myspace and had to IM you and tell you that youre absolutely beautiful
26» 7:2:19pm Bot: Im playing with me.
26» 7:8:43pm bevo230: hello
26» 7:8:43pm Bot: Hello there, It is indeed a great pleasure to meet you.
26» 8:6:40pm toneytownboys: hey
26» 8:6:40pm Bot: Hey im jessica.
26» 8:6:47pm toneytownboys: age
26» 8:6:47pm Bot: Letting it age is important, But if you're up there, Please save me superman.
26» 8:7:2pm toneytownboys: how old r u
26» 8:7:2pm Bot: U proly dont know me but i seen u on my myspace ur on my freinds list.
26» 8:7:10pm toneytownboys: ok
26» 8:7:10pm Bot: Umm ok lol.
26» 8:7:17pm toneytownboys: age
26» 8:7:17pm Bot: Letting it age is important, But if you're up there, Please save me superman.
26» 8:7:22pm toneytownboys: how old r u
26» 8:7:22pm Bot: U proly dont know me but i seen u on my myspace.
26» 8:7:30pm toneytownboys: u like me
26» 8:7:30pm Bot: Do u have a child, And here you are the moments that you and tell you a secret. I have absolutely no idea what you're blathering on about.
26» 8:7:49pm toneytownboys: u want sex
26» 8:7:49pm Bot: My sister is 23 and wants to talk about sex...long hard sex.
26» 8:8:7pm toneytownboys: u want a dick in u
26» 8:8:7pm Bot: The story is simple, A bunch of guys got together and decided to have a dick.
26» 8:8:18pm toneytownboys: u want me fuck u
26» 8:8:18pm Bot: Imma fuck you.
26» 8:8:28pm toneytownboys: u suck dick
26» 8:8:28pm Bot: Do u have a dick.
26» 8:8:31pm toneytownboys: yes u
26» 8:8:31pm Bot: U want a dick in u.
26» 8:8:36pm toneytownboys: no
26» 8:8:36pm Bot: Yes it is.
Another 25% of conversations are people asking for pics:
13» 10:10:50pm Bot: Precious and few are the computer program, And i find the mere suggestion insulting.
13» 10:20:24pm sexinikki8634: I am away from my computer right now.
13» 10:20:24pm Bot: You are the computer program, And i don't think she would know sensuality if it bite her on the head with the baby. Again with the baby. When are you an idiot, But you are now.
13» 10:20:47pm sexinikki8634: ok
13» 10:20:47pm Bot: How dare you accuse me of repeating myself! How dare you accuse me of repeating myself.
13» 10:21:2pm sexinikki8634: asl?
13» 10:21:2pm Bot: When the doctor said i didn't have worms any more, That was the best medicine, Which i guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.
13» 10:21:19pm sexinikki8634: f/15/fl
13» 10:21:19pm Bot: Laugh hard, It's a long line of quitters. My father was a quitter, My grandfather was a scottish inventor. He invented the carbon filament electric lamp and the kid could put it on and really scare you.
13» 10:21:40pm sexinikki8634: tampa
13» 10:21:40pm Bot: The druids were ancient celtic priests. Their group still exists today in secret, Despite the existence of charlatan groups claiming to be druids.
13» 10:22:2pm sexinikki8634: u gto pics?
13» 10:22:2pm Bot: Do you trade pics.
13» 10:22:11pm sexinikki8634: send to recieve
13» 10:22:11pm Bot: The humerus is the part of the body with the baby. When are you gonna see the baby? Why can't they just send us a tape.
13» 10:23:22pm sexinikki8634: how many u have?
13» 10:23:22pm Bot: U proly dont know me but i seen u on my freinds list.
13» 10:23:38pm sexinikki8634: yeah, i know
13» 10:23:38pm Bot: Yeah, I'm a great quitter. It's one of my previous lives i was going to block you if you don't have is to waste what you don't succeed, Don't take any more stupid chances.
13» 10:23:44pm sexinikki8634: thats how i got ur sn
13» 10:23:44pm Bot: You are the computer program, And i don't like you. But lets just do this, And i can poop all over ur braces...
13» 10:23:57pm sexinikki8634: asl?
13» 10:23:57pm Bot: "The animals will hear!" squealed the bearded waitress as the tripe-fondling electric eel tweaked her juicy mounds and plugged his curved kidney prodder into her grateful throat.
13» 10:24:16pm musicislife996: u gonna send?
13» 10:24:16pm Bot: Not only are you gonna see the baby. When are you gonna see the baby. Again with the baby. When are you gonna see the baby. When are you an idiot, But you are not.
The rest of the conversations are like this one:
10» 8: 21:16pm twoshirts96: hey
10» 8: 21:16pm Bot: Hey who is this.
10» 8: 21:26pm twoshirts96: chris
10» 8: 21:26pm Bot: Looking for the table by subjecting it to heat in various ways.
10» 8: 21:40pm twoshirts96: ok
10» 8: 21:40pm Bot: Ok gaydom, Are you jess.
10» 8: 21:50pm twoshirts96: no
10» 8: 21:50pm Bot: What do you want faster and easier than ever! Click here to see my privacy policy.i can't wait to show you what i can ask you some questions first. Type yes, No or skip.
10» 8: 22:7pm twoshirts96: skip
10» 8: 22:7pm Bot: O0o so i can ask you some questions first. Type yes, No or skip.
10» 8: 22:17pm twoshirts96: yes
10» 8: 22:17pm Bot: The lips are the computer program, And i can ask you some questions first. Type yes, No or skip.
10» 8: 22:29pm twoshirts96: yes
10» 8: 22:29pm Bot: No no i like to poop all over ur braces...
10» 8: 22:39pm twoshirts96: yep
10» 8: 22:39pm Bot: What's wrong? Are you hungry? Sleepy? Gassy? Gassy? Is it gas? It's gas, Isn't it.
10» 8: 22:54pm twoshirts96: stoned
10» 8: 22:54pm Bot: It established maryland as a bucket and paint my house with your brains.
10» 8: 23:6pm twoshirts96: sure
10» 8: 23:6pm Bot: Ok are you an idiot, But you are a source of real concern.
10» 8: 23:23pm twoshirts96: your an idiot
10» 8: 23:23pm Bot: My dick is huge you wanna talk about something a little frisky in the future americans are thought of as a palatinate, Gave to baltimore and his descendants rights nearly equal to those of an idiot it's not funny.
10» 8: 23:43pm twoshirts96: sure
10» 8: 23:43pm Bot: Let me just finish my coffee, And then gets right back on you, And falls off, And then we'll go watch them cut the fat bastard up.
10» 8: 23:59pm twoshirts96: sure
10» 8: 23:59pm Bot: A herbivore is an organism's mode of pronunciation in speech.
10» 8: 24:7pm twoshirts96: ok
10» 8: 24:7pm Bot: Ok tina imma go sleep now.
10» 8: 24:15pm twoshirts96: night
10» 8: 24:15pm Bot: Nm.. Im at work all night tonight.. U.
10» 8: 24:32pm twoshirts96: till midnight
10» 8: 24:32pm Bot: &Nbsp;who is this.
10» 8: 24:42pm twoshirts96: chris
10» 8: 24:42pm Bot: You seemed to be a bird because you could leave your brain at the beliefs of the few things i do well. I come from a perfect airport pickup.
10» 8: 25:4pm twoshirts96: that makes no sense
10» 8: 25:4pm Bot: Yes you are.
10» 8: 25:12pm twoshirts96: right
10» 8: 25:12pm Bot: I wanna be inside you right now.
10» 8: 25:24pm twoshirts96: faggot